For sale.

Joy is now for sale.  Anyone want a 6year old quarter horse who has beautiful dun babies, but a mixed attitude under saddle?

It hurts so badly. I am now selling my childhood dreams of having my own horse.  I feel like my heart has fallen through my stomach…but it is the best way.  It costs so much for her to be here while i’m busy taking classes and enjoying my college years.  She wants nothing to do with me.  I feel like somehow I failed her, my parents, and even myself.  But I am out of ideas.  I can say to myself…someday…but when has that ever gotten anyone anywhere.  NEVER.

She’s for sale.  And I hope that she loves whomever she goes to.

Joy’s Tweet!

So I broke down and got a twitter account…it’s all about Joy and I and all the craziness that ensues training, riding, and everything in between!

Find us on twitter: onlyforjoy

Once upon a time….

Once upon a time I was making really great progress with Joy, it was before last winter and she had really taken to jumping! Here’s just a little picture  of her and I jumping! I was so proud of her!!    She still loves to jump, but we have some slightly more important issues to address before we get back to that again.

Here we are!

DON”T LOOK AT MY AWFUL WRISTS! haha

Joy 101 lesson 1

So far it has been a long, long road with Joy. For the first two weeks that I officially owned her no one could neither touch her, nor catch her. She literally went wild, probably for many reasons including her obvious confusion about herd life and her fear of people, especially men. But the first time I saw her (I came home on the two week mark) I felt a jolt of compassion and connection with the then scrawny little mare. I stood in the middle of her field , and she slowly strolled up to me…and with the barest of touches nudged my hand with her nose. 

I was the first person to touch her in weeks, and I was even able to put a halter on her and give MY horse a once over. At the time she was in awful shape, needing several hundred pounds more to fill her out, and she was scared of just about everything that moved. Her only passion…more food. But she was mine, and I was determined to make her into something, even if that something was just a pleasure horse. Her puppy dog personality stole my heart that night, and even after all the things we’ve been through I seem to always come out still loving her!

The picture above is the first photo of Joy that I took.  It had been taken 3 months after my family began to feed and provide for her.

One hoof after the other!

Well I was a little bit unsure of what Joy was going to be like when I went to see her the day after the trail ride.  I was hoping for a happy horse, as usual.  When I got out to the stable it was very very chilly and windy, but as I tacked her up Joy seemed to completely unworried by the weather.  As soon as I smounted up though, I could tell there was something wrong.  Joy is very open with her misbehaving nature, and if she feels like being a brat then you will know.  And by the time that we had moved just off the mounting block she had her head up and tense, and her whole body was as rigid as a rock.  But here came the biggest shock.  She just stopped in the middle of the ring. When I clucked she tossed her head, and when I squeezed my legs she began to paw and paw at the ground until I pulled her back up with the reins.  The final surprise came as I nudged her with my heels she threw her head back and just a bit came off the ground with her front legs. I had never seen or had my horse rear with me and it surprised and scared me.  After that she repeated it each time that I attempted to get her to move forward.  After 25 minutes of painful arguing with Joy I had managed to move her only a slight distance across the ring.  I felt devastated by this huge step backward in our horse/rider relationship.  Now what.  I can’t even get my horse to walk on cue.  Oh Joy.

Gobble gets the last laugh.

The first evening I went out to ride her it was probably one of the final great days of fall with a warm sun and all the beautiful leaves.  Some of the others from the stable were going out for trail ride, and they invited me.  Knowing Joy’s hatred of new and potentially scary places I almost said no, but since there were two beginners going I figured that we would be fine.  We actually got a good 10 minutes into the ride and it was almost worry-free (shock for both Joy and I).  In fact other horses in our group were acting up while Joy was unrattled by the situations.  She walked calmly, ears pricked, while I slowly relaxed.  Even when presented with a small creek bed with the option to leap it like a deer and go crazy, she gently walked up and down both sides.  I almost died of shock.  And then it happened….in the worse tight knit, tree filled trail space…two of the stead school horses spooked and a flock, yes an entire FLOCK of turkeys took off next to us.  Joy almost collasped under me in devastation. 

While they fluttered above, Joy attempted to throw herself through the trees toward home.  I managed just barely to keep her under control, even as another horse rammed into her from the back.  I used my words, trying so hard to reach into her panicked brain.  I just touched upon her sanity, and was able to get her to a stop.  The other horses were attemting to run over us to get back home, so I hopped to the ground and held her head while the other riders got there horses under control.  In the end no one fell off or was hurt.  But the turkeys definately got the last laugh.  After walking her out of the trees I mounted back up…this was a point where her being little was really nice.  As soon as I got on though I recognized that I was on the ‘old Joy’; the one that I dreaded riding for months.  She was in no sense of mind to be ridden, I was simply on for the ride.  We made it somewhat calmly to the open field directly behind the stable…and then I had no control.  Her head was almost completely back in my face, and she had the bit in her teeth.  She would not tolerate the other horses and several times squealed and struck out at them.  It was a complete 180 of the horse I had started out with.  I tried talking to her, and walking big calm circles, but in the end I had to lead her up the road to home so she was not putting the others at risk.  I was so disappointed.  I know that she was scared, but it was the fact that there was NO recovery in her mind from being scared.  She was pathetic when we got home and just wanted to be loved on.  What am I going to do with her?  Silly silly mare.  I hope this doesn’t destroy tomorrow’s ride.

She’s back…

Joy is back with me after two weeks in the big city…she was being tried by a family there who were thinking of buying her.  It was hard, and as soon as I got her on that trailer I knew that I had made the decision to let her go way too fast.  I knew that no matter what happened I was going to be with her until I completely gave her all I could.  Until now maybe I have had my priorities in the wrong places.  Now that she is back, and beautiful as ever…as sweet as ever…I now realize that I need to give her a REAL chance with me.  I have always considered her to be something to make me better, but now I need to rethink that.  Our relationship needs to make both of us better….me a better rider, and her a better horse in general.   I can’t wait to get to working with her!

The longest ‘rode’

Yes I very much did just use a pun in the title.  Don’t judge, I’m just easily amused.  I am beginning this blog with the hopes of seeking out the support from horse lovers worldwide.  I have been riding for many years, and in the past I showed horses in the hunter, jumper, and even a little in the western ring.  I thrive on competition and find it to be completely addictive, but college has currently sidelined me from the competitive world of horses.  Although homework has kept me out of the show ring, there is nothing in this world that can keep me from horses.  My whole life has been revolved around first just seeing them, then riding them, loving them, and now..now my world of horses revolves around her.  She’s truly a beautiful creature.  My mare, Joy, is quickly becoming a centerpiece in the craziness of my life.  I got Joy almost a year and a half ago, and upon first seeing her all I felt was pity and desolution.  She was a product of my parents love for animals, and their desire to keep me sane as I suffered through my college studies.  Unfortunately, she was also a product of abuse and neglect. 

My parents rescued her for me hoping that my riding experience would be able to bring back some spark of life into Joy.  Over the past year and a half I’ve had more ups and downs with this horse than a rollarcoaster.  It’s be a learning experience for both her and I.  Not only that but it continues to be one, and as I go through this I am hoping to connect with people here who have had these experiences and can give me the advice I sometimes desperately need.